Redesign of Crime Noir piece

Redesign of the Crime Noir piece I did last week.  I had a buddy help me with some better photo-reference and that helped a lot.  I mean a lot!  adding the gun helped but I think the body position is 101% improved.  First pic up is the pencils, then the line-art and finally the scan. 

Inked - Crime Noir Piece

I am kind of on the fence with how I feel this one came out.  It says "victim" to me and not "danger".  Any way the crime noir piece is finished and I am waiting to hear what the client says.  I did another version of this that I will post later.  It says "danger" the guy has a gun and looked a lot tougher.

Crime-Noir

 

I am doing a job for a guy who is doing a script for a crime-noir webseries.  This is one of my sketches.  All of the black is surprisingly intimidating.  Although the man is supposed to be a detective, he seems more like a zombie.  So I am changing the guy.  Took some reference photos yesterday, hopefully I can make him a bit more...tough?  Yeah tough.